103. On the hilarious complexity of polyamorous communities

I have an open marriage. In theory, the only thing that separates it from a more traditional monogamous one, is that we can both have intimate entanglements with other people without it being a problem. Simple, right?

Well, yes, actually it is.

An often used word for a setup where multiple partners are considered ok is polyamory. The acceptance of more than one amorous relationship at the same time.

Welcome to the Zoo

Antilope is marrried to Buffalo. Antilope has a relationship with Cobra, sleeps with Dolphin once in a while and once did a five-some that included (amongst others!) Elephant and Gorilla.

The real picture is even more complicated

This is just the tip of the iceberg. There’s more.

The impressive thing is that it works.

Not flawlessly. Not without ups and downs. But it does work. And while it seems pretty opaque to outsiders, to those who are part of it, it all makes sense.

It has to be.

It’s good training, though

Everyone has not only slept with someone else in the group. They’re also probably still doing so, and they inhabit the same social circles.

Director at The College of Extraordinary Experiences, Coach at McKinsey & Founding Partner at The Global Institute For Thought Leadership. Author of 31 books.